Monkey writes to the governor of New Hampshire

Tuesday, 29 January 2008


diebold election fraud

Dear Governor Lynch

The Secretary of State’s office has been delaying and stalling the recount requested and paid for by Mr Albert Howard. This recount is from the January 8, 2008 primary – a whopping 20 days ago. The obvious fraud prompted Mr Howard to request this recount, but he has been stymied at every turn and time is of the essence on this recount which should have been finished ten days ago.


Additionally, certain individuals in the office of the Secretary of State have likely committed violations of New Hampshire’s election laws and I am requesting you to do two things:


(1) Step in and direct the Secretary of State William M Gardner, to get the recount done this week, and


(2) Direct the Attorney General for the State of New Hampshire to open an investigation into likely violations of New Hampshire’s elections laws, ie chain of custody of the ballots, slits in the ballot boxes and unlawful transport and security of the ballots.


NH Election laws including RSA chapters 39 & 40: 660:5: Conduct of recount. If directed by the SOS, the State Police shall collect all ballots requested from the town or city clerks having custody of them and shall deliver them to the public facility designated by the SOS.


I sincerely hope your office is able to put a stop to this madness and see that justice is served.

Sincerely yours

Large Discrepancies Found in New Hampshire Recount


Max always loves authority

Tuesday, 29 January 2008
stop eu

London was really good. I saw a lot of friends, went for my favourite walk with Jono along the south bank of the river and experienced some unusual art in the Tate Modern that involved mounted policemen. I also spent one night in a village in Sussex where I got to walk with Harry the dog and Big G along country lanes late at night under the stars.

Still, I am always happy to land back in Prague. When I arrived at the airport yesterday afternoon, there were only 5 windows open at passport control and 3 of them were for EU/EEA passport holders only. The 2 “ALL OTHER PASSPORTS” queues were not particularly long, but they were moving unusually slowly. I had chosen the queue with the higher ratio of white people, but it seems that that may no longer be the right strategy.

After observing what was going on up at the window for a few minutes, I started to suspect that perhaps the immigration cop was being a bit overzealous. I considered changing queues, but then I thought – I have a long-term visa in my passport so I should have nothing to worry about.

Will I never learn?

I smiled as I said “Dobrý den” and handed her my passport. She put my passport in the reader, then took it out and examined the photograph and then looked intently at me and then examined the photograph and then looked intently at me and then examined the photograph again.

She studied every page of my passport, and I have a double-thick passport and most of the pages are full of stamps. She finally settled on my current Czech visa, which is valid until March, and she decided she didn’t like it.

You don’t have a normal visa.

I do, you have it there.

What kind of visa is this? It’s not trvalý pobyt, it’s not dlouhodobý pobyt.

Yes, it is, it’s dlouhodobý pobyt.

No, this is not the right kind of visa, it doesn’t look right. You don’t have the right stamp on it. Where is the red stamp? This is přechodný pobyt.

Now, I have had all of those different kinds of visas and I had no idea what she was on about. Trvalý pobyt is permanent residency – what I had when I was married to a Czech. Dlouhodobý pobyt is long-term residency – what you usually have if you are employed by a company or self-employed under a Czech trade licence. Přechodný pobyt is temporary residency – what I had when I was a contractor to the Ministry of Defence through the US Department of Defence. And it shouldn’t have made any difference to her what was in my passport as long as it wasn’t expired.

She eventually gave up that line of questioning to try another. She asked me if I had that white entry paper that they used to use with long-term visas. I told her that I did not, that I had never used one. She didn’t believe me. I thought for a minute that she wasn’t going to let me in because I didn’t have that paper even though they had always had blank ones for people to fill in – back when they used to use them, I mean. She said that I had the old kind of visa and therefore I needed the white entry paper. I just stared at her like she was completely mental, because she was.

The cop babbled away for another few minutes and I just stared at her. Then suddenly she shrugged, shook her head and sighed, looked at me like I was a completely hopeless case, and at last stamped my passport and allowed me through to the other side.

Max is away

Thursday, 24 January 2008


Max is home

Monday, 21 January 2008

…and I found this beautiful photograph of a snowy Prague on the interweb. There is not actually any snow in town right now, but we can hope.

praha v zimě

Max is away

Friday, 18 January 2008
Velká Úpa
…on a forced weekend in the mountains with work colleagues.

Deniers of History

Wednesday, 16 January 2008
warsaw ghetto monument

Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.

– George Santayana

Yesterday I read that some German neo-Nazis want to join their untermenschen brethren on their march in Plzeň in West Bohemia this coming Saturday. That march “coincides” with the anniversary of the first transport of the Jews of Plzeň to the concentration camp at Terezín in 1942.

Czech neo-Nazis had tried to march in Prague last November, but they were unsuccessful due to the actions of ordinary people who do not tolerate fascism.

Anyway, still yesterday, I was curious to see if the European Jewish Press had picked up on the Plzeň story so I looked at their website. There was nothing on Plzeň, but I was surprised to see two stories on Holocaust deniers being sentenced to prison for their crimes.

I have already written about my thoughts on free speech and Holocaust denial. I have also spoken on the radio about it. Basically, free speech is sacred and no one should be jailed for saying what they believe.

But there are certain questions that need to be addressed:

How can people actually believe that the Holocaust never happened? Or that we have exaggerated its magnitude?

Why do these deniers have an audience? Who would be ignorant enough to believe them in the face of overwhelming proof that the Holocaust did happen and the Nazis did kill 6 million Jews as well as millions of other victims?

A former right-wing city councillor in Austria was sentenced to prison after having been convicted of Holocaust denial for the third time.

The German who was convicted is a 44-year old lawyer. I found that shocking – someone who is of a younger and more enlightened generation, and highly educated. How can she deny history like that?

Perhaps the most famous Holocaust denier is David Irving, who is now also known for his unsuccessful lawsuit against the historian Deborah Lipstadt. Irving sued Dr Lipstadt for libel after she had named him as a Holocaust denier in her book Denying the Holocaust.

Due to the nature of English defamation law and process, Dr Lipstadt had to prove that what she had written about Irving was true. Her legal team therefore had to show in an English court of law that the Holocaust had really happened. It was an absurd situation on one level, but entirely fascinating on another. And most importantly – it demonstrated that truth always prevails in the end. Dr Lipstadt wrote an excellent book about the case, History on Trial.

So don’t send the Holocaust deniers to jail. They should be allowed to make complete arseholes of themselves. At the same time, however, we need to shout over them, drown them out and make sure people know how ridiculous they are.

No one should be ignorant of history. It has always happened again.

Upping the Ante

Monday, 14 January 2008

This post follows on both my new fitness regimen and my New Year’s cut-down-drinking resolution.

The fitness is going well. I normally see my trainer 3 times per week and get into the gym at least once more on my own. Results are visible, my muscles are more solid and defined and my back feels stronger than it has in years.

The drinking is going okay. Boris was around last week and he keeps me pretty sensible in that respect. My only night of substantial over-indulgence was the night I was out with people other than Boris. However I only managed one day with no alcohol at all.

Boris is super fit. He has worked in the fitness industry forever, he has been a trainer, and it seems to me that he knows everything there is to know about health and fitness and physiology. But Boris has been having trouble lately in motivating himself to go to the gym.

Somehow last night we decided to turn our quests for self-improvement into a wager, as follows. Every week, for the next 10 weeks:

Boris has to work out 5 times per week; and

Max has to work out 3 times per week + have 2 alcohol-free days.

Whoever does not manage to fulfil their agenda for any given week has to donate £20 to the charity the other has chosen.

We also have an accumulator. As Boris too will endeavour to have alcohol-free days, we will earn one point for each workout and one point for each non-drinking day. Whoever ends the 10 weeks with the highest total of points is the winner. The loser will have to donate £50 to each of the two charities we have chosen.

The bet begins today.